Parvathy O knows the Miss World Lexicon

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When it comes to beauty pageants, we desi girls know exactly what to say.

Parvathy Omanakuttan was crowned 1st runner up in the Miss World 2008 pageant last night. At the risk of agitating a whole community of mallus and probably the Femina Miss India folks too, who crowned her Miss India 2008 in the first place and sent her to Johannesburg, I have to say that I didn’t think she had a chance in hell.

I don’t think she is pretty. At the pageant finale (televised live on Zee Café last night), she wore this very uninspiring white gown. Her hair looked like it had just come out of the dryer in the laundromat. When she was the 15th name called forward to the semi-final line up, I attributed it to luck. Then they chose her for the final 5 and I muttered to myself “the beauty industry needs the Indian market, that’s why.”

Finally came that all-important question, where beauty queens have traditionally delved deep into a pageant-lexicon that includes heart-warming syllables like ‘love’, ‘compassion’, ‘caring’, ‘sharing’, ‘peace’, purpose’, etc etc. And, Parvathy chechee, bless her burnt-the-midnight-oil, examination-ready soul, made all the right noises. “India. South Africa. Two great cultures. Kindness. Hospitality. Gave the world two great men. Gandhi. Mandela.” Girl, you are the best! You knew just the right things to say! You must have rehearsed hard with copious notes and FAQs. But, look, it’s all borne fruit.

There’s all this new agey pop-psychology going around to ‘be who you are’. Obviously, it doesn’t work in beauty pageants. Sample what Ms South Africa, all plumped up with her home crowd advantage, replied when asked why she should be crowned Miss World. “Because I have already made South Africa proud. Imagine what I could do if I got to be Miss World.” (Attitude, babe!!) Needless to say, the judges on Miss World Ltd’s payroll weren’t convinced. The crown went to Miss Russia. I was quite OK with that. She IS a stunner (c’mon, this is after all a beauty contest).

PS: Read on only if you don’t mind futile trivia. Halle Berry was a Miss World contestant. And she didn’t even win.

Comments

Gollum said…
Mumukshu,
I absolutely agree with what you ahve written on Parvati O. She didnt deserve to be in the 15 let alone be a runner up. She also looked extremely seedy and bimboish.
Have you ever wondered or figured out why the judges go all ga ga when skimpy clad women in g strings always talk about the solidarity of women and world peace and harmony in beauty paegents?
December 23, 2008 at 9:13 AM
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